The Ten Second Amendment

SANTA FE, NM - Ain't nobody looking out for nobody on this frontier - less they bandit or pervert. You reading this scrapbook, they done cut my suspenders - goddamn lawman. I figured it this way. That pine box been coming full split.

Got a record at eleven years, 'cause some damn bugger askin' bout a apple peeler. Bag of nails since. Kicked outta schoolhouse on why I beefed a man. They take no account of a child's family ain't got no money.

Between hay 'an grass, I dicker'd for low jobs, 'til word got back on suppos'd felony. Landlords ain't wanna hear heap about it neither. No sense barkin' a knot - learn't to hobble my lip 'an cut stick.

Near ten years now 'an down to the blanket. Cracked men sneaking up 'cause they heard you plumb'd a hill o' beans, 'an they don't take no account of drifters. Ditched and bulldozed in alley court on no charge of livin' among the willows.

Justice ain't but a lick 'an promise. Them tracks was to the boot yard 'an nothing figures for it.

Lies, Damn Lies, And Business Cards

NEW MOMBASA, KE - If anybody asked, Kobin told them he worked on the popular M12 Warthog Light Reconnaissance Vehicle. That was maybe half-true, but it was short and seemed to satisfy people. This was the flagship product of AMG Transport Dynamics. Of course, nobody ever heard of AMG outside the MIC - they were a white-label defense contractor.

Inside every Warthog was this On-Board Diagnostics that monitored fuel, power, vehicle, and weapon systems - to verify status and flag maintenance issues. It's not really exclusive to the M12, every vehicle had it. But nobody ever heard of the OBD, which was probably why they always had job openings.

In New Employee Orientation, everyone took selfies with the Warthog parked in the lobby. His actual job for the next eighteen months was to simulate and test the 10-Pin Wire Quick-Connect. Within OBD, they said this was considered prestigious since that tiny connector would be on the outside of the box - it would be seen.

At least his business cards said M12 Warthog Light Reconnaissance Vehicle, he thought. They let you put whatever you like on them.

The Cool Club Secret Handshake

TACOMA, WA - How long before we just have to suck it up? Zach figured he was going to fail his second decade - just a bug stuck-in-place. He needed something - he needed out. Zach was seventeen.

His neighbor had this classic car, in a thousand parts, under decayed blue tarps on his back lawn. It hadn't moved in decades until they opened the fence and pushed it across like a poker jackpot. Zach had bet everything on a '71 BMW 2800CS and a service manual.

People who never built a car told Zach the heap in his parent's yard was a terrible idea. They once tried a thing and failed, and that just goes to show you. But Zach also knew guys that had done it, and they had useful stories. That summer he learned some welding, wiring, and who to ask for help.

It was September when he finally got it rolling. Strangers waved and talked to him when they saw it - offered him wads of cash to buy it. They wanted a ride, and they asked his opinions. Folks shook his all beat-to-hell and dirty hands.